I’m a sucker for free stuff and even more so with free stuff from races.
In 2019, that’s really all it took for me to upgrade my race from Silicon Valley 10K to the Silicon Valley Half Marathon even though I had never run farther than 6.2 miles, and I had yet to ever do that without stopping.
It didn’t matter. I was blinded by the bling. In a lot of ways, I still am to this day.
“How do I get one of those backpacks?” I hesitantly asked. My question was met by a nice young lady with lots of enthusiasm.
“I’ll give you a free backpack and a quarter-zip long-sleeve if you upgrade your race from the 10K to the Half Marathon.
“Oh really? How much more is it?” I asked. It might have sounded better if I had just said, “Take my money! Please! Just give me that cool-looking backpack.”
It didn’t matter, I paid the fee without playing the tape all the way through because all I wanted was some free stuff. *heavy eye roll*
Moments later, I was walking away with an SV Half Marathon backpack and quarter-zip long-sleeve. I got back to my car, got ready to pull out of the parking spot, then reality hit me.
“I just signed up for a fucking half marathon without any training,” I said to myself.
Anxiety hit next.
Should I take the stuff back?
Can I?
Shit!
Well, now I have to run it.
At the time, I had no idea how to run long distances. I thought of myself as a basketball player, an old, 5-foot 7-inch, 200-pound runner with indications of high blood pressure kind of basketball player. I might have lost a good amount of weight and had been running regularly, but I really wasn’t prepared to run 13.1 miles for a damn backpack and a medal.
As a young athlete, I was used to doing wind sprints in practice. Basketball, football, baseball, soccer; they all made me do wind sprints. Being the fastest Mexican kid at every school I transferred to for the majority of my childhood sort of groomed me for running fast. So it’s always been natural for me to do things like run hard and finish strong. But I never paid any attention when I would ride my bike next to my parents while they were on their long runs in the Evergreen Hills of San Jose.
It wasn’t until that moment, sitting in my car searching the internet for how to run a half marathon, that the thought of ever running a half marathon would ever become a reality.
Have you ever jumped off a cliff into a body of water?
Do you remember the first time you did it?
There’s a moment right before you jump where the strength of your anxiety, the fear that lives inside you, keeps you from jumping. It’s almost crippling. When you were in the water looking up, the jumping point didn’t look that high, but now that you’re on top of the cliff, on the edge, you tremble.
Your breath shortens. Legs weak. Fear. It consumes you. It rushes through your body in the form of adrenaline as you stare at the water.
Then you hear the chants from your friends, Jump! You can do it! Jump! Don’t be scared!
The shouts motivate you to believe it’s possible. You take a few deep breaths, start talking yourself into it, until finally you know that you can jump and you’ll survive.
That’s when you jump. And for a split second, the fear is gone; you’re free; you’re flying. Then you hit the water and the cold water pulls the fear out of you once and for all, leaving nothing but the joy of accomplishment. The rush is intoxicating and you can’t wait to jump again.